#LaoNiangWalktheGround: Lao Niang watched the Presidential candidate broadcasts so you don’t have to


3 Presidential Candidates, but you only have ONE vote. Who will win your vote???

In exactly 1 more week, we will need to go to the polling station to cast our 神圣的一票 (sacred vote) to choose our President liao. Have you all decided which presidential candidate to vote for liao mah??? Xiao excites!

In order to win our hearts and votes, the 3 presidential candidates appeared on National TV last night to deliver their campaign message.

And again, in case you all buey si diam, cannot sit still to watch their speech, here’s a summarized version of each of the presidential candidate’s speech:

1. Ng Kok Song’s campaign message and why you need to vote for him

  • Lim peh ish non-partisan, means lim peh ish not affiliated with any political parties.
  • Lim peh got experience in dealing with $$$ because Lim peh work in GIC as chief investment officer before.
  • Lim peh wants to be the person to keep a “constitutional check” the Gahmen, so that they won’t anyhowly raid the country’s reserves, or appoint incompetent or corrupt individuals to key public service positions.
  • Lim peh can do this because Lim peh is Lim peh.
  • Lim peh is not affiliated with any political parties.
  • Lim peh is not affiliated with any political parties.
  • Lim peh is not affiliated with any political parties.


But say real one hor, Kok Song shu shu, other than you not affiliated with any political parties is your only plus point hor, can elaborate a bit more on your international experience and exposure or not ah? Cannot be base on just because you not affiliated with any political party then expect us to elect you as president mah, correct?

After all, as a president of Singapore, you are like an influencer representing Singapore leh. This one is the Goody Feed Blue Cat say one. You must 1. Be the ambassador and symbol for Singapore and overseas leh and 2. Be the second key to our reserves.

If you don’t have international exposure and experience, go overseas camping and holiday not counted ah, how can we be assure that when you go overseas and meet important people, you won’t throw our face leh?

Other things don’t say lah hor, as a Chinese, reporter ask you if you can speak mandarin, you say you 不要 (don’t want),不可以 (cannot) liao, how to trust that you can do your job as a president well and won’t throw our face until overseas?

And ah, later ask you if we can use the reserves to save lives and livelihoods or not, you say 不要 (don’t want),不可以 (cannot) how??? Lao niang xiao worry, know?

2. Tharman’s campaign message and why you need to vote for him

  • Lim peh in politics for many many years liao. Got experience on ground and Lim peh ish also got a lot of experience in formulating financial policies as a civil servant and in the Cabinet.
  • Lim peh can your best influencer for Singapore. Because hor, beyond Singapore, Lim peh also got experience in Gahmen and international standing to promote the Singapore’s interests.
  • You know? Lim peh have been flying the Singapore flag high internationally for so many years liao. So don’t you worry, Lim peh will work actively to strengthen our existing partnerships and even build new ones ok!
  • Lim peh can also protect our reserves well also because Lim peh got jin jwey (a lot of) experience. Lim peh worked as the Finance Minister from 2007 to 2015 and Deputy Prime Minister from 2011 to 2019.
  • Lim peh also worked as the chairman of the Monetary Authority of Singapore and also got chaired GIC’s Investment Strategies Committee for 12 years.
  • If Lim peh is fortunate enough to be elected by you, Lim peh will serve you with all my heart and we all HUAT together ok!


Aiyo Tharman ah Tharman, Lao Niang also know that hor out of all the presidential candidates you are like the best person to be the President. But hor, the sayang thing is, you from People’s Action Party (PAP) leh. How ah? Is because of this hor, a lot of people, especially the anti-establishment don’t want to vote for you bah, I think.

Presidential Election 2023: Hearsay Tharman Ong Lai Boh Bao Jiak leh

Is a bit like you know this product is good, fits all the 功能(function) and value for money but you DIE-DIE don’t want to buy because you like Lululemon, and don’t like Nike.

Xiao childish, but it’s about EGO you know?

3. Tan Kin Lian’s campaign message and why you need to vote for him


  • Lim peh is independent and not from PAP.
  • Lim peh think you must choose Lim peh is because you must have different kinds of people sitting at the top levels of public service and not just scholars right?
  • Lim peh is like your coffee shop uncle, can sit in coffee shop and chit chat with you in your language.
  • Lim peh wants to build a Singapore where people are united and live in harmony.


Kin Lian ah Kin Lian, by your logic, is it my lao peh also can be president? He is also not scholar leh. He also can sit in coffee shop and chit chat with all the uncles in Melayu, Hokkien, Cantonese and Hakka!!!!

Lao niang won’t bring up your pretty girls issue lah hor because we all got our own fetish lah.

But hor you say you independent and not from PAP, a bit like bluff people? Do a quick Google search, the results show that you were a former member of PAP for 30 years until 2008 wor. You even served as the party’s branch secretary at Marine Parade for three years leh! You think lao niang never study a lot of books then want to smoke me ah?

Don’t say last time lah, now ah, this Tan Jee Say from Singapore Democratic Party (SDP) is your proposer and the founder of the People’s Voice party, Lim Tean, is your seconder leh. Like that you want to say you not affiliated to political parties, a bit like lying in our faces? You think we 3 years old ah? Tsk tsk. MINUS MARK!

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